


Catch me (because I didn't know I'm falling)

by sureiminsane



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Charaketer death kinda?, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, M/M, Oneshot, People don't stay dead, The fluffiest Ketch you can imagine, but this is supernatural
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-18
Updated: 2017-02-18
Packaged: 2018-09-25 08:50:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9811979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sureiminsane/pseuds/sureiminsane
Summary: The Men of Letters were in America for over a year when order no one expected came and left Arthur with an impossible choice... And he cannot disobey those who are higher in ranks. Or can he?





	

**Author's Note:**

> Not beta read! Sorry for typos!

The order came from above. Not Heaven-above, but even higher. From the Old Men. Mick looked at the machine and typed back a few times, but there was no room for discussion. It had to be done. Thankfully, there was always Ketch at hand.  
"Arthur." Mick said, smiling.  
Ketch looked at him with a blank expression, but a mild annoyment could be seen in the slight crook if his eyebrows and a tightness in his lips. He was in the middle of his relaxation ritual aka cleaning his weapons.  
"Yes….Mick?" He spat the name.  
It was new invention of his boss' to call people by their first names even tough their relationship was strictly business. After all Ketch was just one of the assets to the MoL.  
"We have new orders." The annoying bastard said with a slimy smile plastered to his face. Was is customary to hate your coworkers? Anyhow, Arthur hated that guy. Not that he could act on it. He let out one of his best fake smiles.  
"What are those new orders, sir?"  
"Kill Castiel."  
That one he wasn't expecting and maybe his features twitched into surprise for a moment, but he made his best to hide it.  
He spent some time with Castiel as the previous order was to get closer to the Winchesters, and as much as the brothers and Mary treated him like an angry dog that might bite someone, Castiel was talking with him like… Like with an equal. It has never happened to him, except for the little time he spent with his brothers and sisters. Maybe that's because Castiel wasn't human. He never talked to someone who wasn't human before, not like that. Usually they didn't even have time to beg.  
He tried to shake that weird little… something off, but then Mick started meeting with hunters regularly and that gave him the time to wander off.  
Arthur didn't even know when plucking out his phone to find a text filled with outrageous number of emoticons became his habit.  
He and Cas… Castiel, had quite a lot in common. They both were soldiers and Arthur found himself laughing more times than ever in his life. Something told him that Castiel didn't have many reasons to smile either, what was a shame, because he looked gorgeous when he did. They understood each other.  
It was almost a year since they came to America. This place was rubbing off on him.  
"Why?" Ketch asked, looking at Mick with his best blank expression.  
The leader stared at him in shock. Then he blinked twice and his pretty face scrunched into expression of anger.  
"What do you mean, why?!" Mick raged. "He's an angel. Do I have to spell it for you?"  
"No, sir." Ketch protested calmly but it was too late. He must've hit a nerve.  
"Kill Castiel." Mick hissed. "That's an order."  
A flare of pain exploded in Ketch's palm and the tattoo lit up with burning orange.  
"Of course, sir." All Arthur's strength went into not wincing at the piercing pain spreading, crawling like invisible flames up his arm. "I will depart immediately."  
He packed his gun and anti-angel sigils into a suitcase, the burn now gone, only a memory and soreness in the arm like a month-old scar.  
Ketch left the motel followed by Mick's curses. The stoic attitude went to hell when that bastard hit a dead end.  
And Arthur just started causing trouble.

He texted Castiel informing that he's coming over to bunker. At Cas'… Castiel's worried text if something happened he replied that indeed, but he must discuss it face to face.

I need to speak with you alone. -Arthur

He wrote it before thinking and he gaped at his own name written as a signature. He usually wrote "Mr.Ketch" at the end, texting Cas from different burners.

Sam, Dean and Mary are on a family hunt. You can come in.

Ketch took a deep breath and parked his vehicle next to the entrance. He was in his best suit. Arthur dusted off whatever remained on his clothes from the short journey and the bunker door opened before him.  
"Hello, Castiel." Ketch tried to smile but it was obviously fake one.  
"Arthur." It was weird, to hear his first name in Cas' voice. "Come in."  
He stepped in, the palm of his hand burning again, not the all-consuming flame, but equal to the feeling of burning iron jammed into his hand where the cross laid. He left his bag on the motor, taking only a gun. Disobedient. The fire was pulsating in the steady rhythm.  
Obey. Obey. Obey.  
He walked down the stairs before Castiel, fighting his instincts that were telling him not to let anyone walk behind him. He rubbed his tattoo uselessly. Long ago he learned that nothing helped with the pain.  
Ketch saw a bar so he gestured at it and Castiel nod his head, sitting at the table.  
"Be my guest." He said, making this adorable frowny face, unsure if he used the phrase right.  
Arthur walked towards the bar and poured himself a glass of whiskey. He gulped it down and after a moment he poured himself another as well as one for Castiel.  
Ketch turned around and handed the glass to the surprised angel. Cas took the glass and waited for the man to sit across him.  
"Are you aware that I need more than a glass to get drunk?"  
"I know." Ketch's features betrayed him, lips tilting up into a smile. "Humour me."  
Cas looked at the man, then at his glass and nod finally, sipping his drink.  
"I don't know my parents." Ketch started and the angel squinted at him. "I have many brothers and sisters, or so I call them. They are assassins on behalf of Men of Letters, just like me."  
Arthur sipped his drink, right hand starting to tremble under the heat.  
"We all were orphans. Children no one cared about, no one even reported missing. They gave us shelter, food, purpose. Many died fighting with monsters. Many went insane. Those I never saw again. At the age of 16 we had our ceremony."  
Ketch put the drink at the table, unable to hold it in hand. He stared at it, looking back to the almost forgotten memories.  
"We were so excited back then. We thought we're finally getting accepted to the men of letters, that we matter." He sneered. "What a foolish thought."  
Castiel looked like he wanted to leap trough the table to get closer to the man, but he merely sipped his drink, not knowing what to say. Arthur looked up.  
"They said it was the final test, we all stood here where each of us was getting the tattoo. What we didn't expect was the spell." He rubbed the tattoo again, like he wanted to cleanse it from his skin. "Only one out of ten made it out alive. All my friends died, eyes bleeding, pale lips, clutching their tattoos. It hurt like nothing in this world. And when it stopped. I cared about nothing, nothing at all. They asked me to step on the corpses on my friends and I did it without hesitation. For all this years I did everything they told me. I never questioned. I killed, robbed, disposed of bodies. Even if I didn't wanted to, I had no choice because of this mark."  
Ketch rubbed his face.  
"Today… today I got an order I questioned. I never felt…this. Not after the ceremony. I cared for nothing and no one for all this years, but since I came here... Since I spoke with you, something changed."  
"Yes, the Winchesters have that impact on people." Cas said, his shoulders slumping slightly.  
"I didn't mean them." Ketch shook his head. "You are the only one I talked with."  
They look into each other's eyes for a long, long time. Cas frowned.  
"I cannot see what in me could change you." The angel seemed a bit sad. "I'm just a failure. The one that came out with a crack in his chassis."  
"I don't think that's adequate." Ketch leaned forward across the table, his and Castiel's faces inches apart. "I used to live in the darkness, even more so than those I killed. But you…"

Mick and the three Winchesters are sitting at the table, Ketch watches them from the park across the street. He feels someone's presence and tuns around, gun ready. Castiel merely glares at him, but he doesn't lower the weapon.  
"I would strongly advise against the use of firearms." The angel says. "It might cause unnecessary panic."  
Ketch lowers his weapon and glances in Micks direction. He was ordered to watch over his commander while he's at the meeting.  
"I agree." Arthur says. "I believe I am here for the same reason as you are, Angel."  
"Are you, Mr. Ketch?" Castiel asks and sits on the bench next to the man.  
They sit in silence, Ketch watching the table like a hawk, sparing Castiel a glance time to time. Whether the angel was aware of it or not, his vessel was hot. There was also something in his eyes, in the expressions, something not human, but endearing.  
Sun glitters in Cas' eyes and Arthur catches himself staring. A small smile crooks up angel's lips and his a bit messy dark hair look like someone had just put a hand through them.  
"Watching humanity never gets old." Angel says and Ketch follows his gaze for the first time and sees that 5e angel isn't watching over the Winchesters, but smiles at a little kid playing in the fountain and her mother, splashing water at the child. Soon a man comes along and the whole family laughs and the kid screeches with delight.  
"So, you're not here to watch the Winchesters?" Ketch asks, surprised.  
"I decided to stay nearby on my own accord. If they need help, they will call me." Cas says and closes his amazingly blue eyes and turns his face to warm up in the Sun.  
It takes all Ketch's control to do the same, to enjoy the moment, listen to the sounds all around, not looking for a thread. Something he haven't done in ages.  
When he finally opens his eyes, the meeting is about to end and Castiel is gone. A piece of paper lays on the bench under a small pebble. There is a phone number scribbled in a neat, tight script.  
Arthur smiles.

"I can't even explain it." Arthur smiled softly. "All that you said and did. Your loyalty to your friends. You are amazing. It was like I saw the Sun for he first time in my life."  
"You surely…" Cas started but Arthur shook his head.  
"Don't try to protest." Ketch said and Castiel kept silent at the sight of the open, soft expression on Arthur's face. He didn't know the assassin was capable of it even while sleeping. Castiel leaned back, trying to gare at Ketch, but the man seemed to ignore it completely.  
"Why are you telling me this?" Castiel asked, looking at Ketch with those infuriatingly blue eyes.  
"Because the order I got today…" Arthur stood up."…was to kill you."  
Castiel didn't move, didn't even blink, like he was expecting this.  
"So why didn't you?" Angel asked, spinning his drink around. "You said you cannot disobey."  
"I can't." Ketch smiled, the burn spreading to his chest, making his blood boil. "But I decided to not listen anymore."  
It was one swift movement when Ketch took out his gun and put it to his head. Cas' eyes widened, he leaped towards the man, but it was too late.  
"I'm sorry." Ketch smiled. "But it's the only way."  
Blood splashed over Castiel's front and the bunker walls. A limo body of Arthur Ketch fell backwards and slid against the wall. The cross-shaped tattoo faded away and disappeared like a black mist.  
Castiel stood there frozen in place, his heart hurting like someone shot him in the chest. His vision blurred and something started to fall from his eyes. Tears. Castiel was crying.  
He didn't even know angels could cry.  
After what seemed like eternity and had to be twenty seconds or so the door to the bunker swung open and three panicked Winchesters jumped in, guns drawn.  
"Cas?!" Dean hollered.  
"I'm…" Castiel's voice broke. He tried again. "I'm here."  
"We heard a gunshot, are you…?" Sam moosed in and then he saw Ketch. Dean and Mary stopped dead in their tracks.  
"Did you…?" Dean started, Mary held her gun up like she was about to shot.  
"No." Cas tried to discreetly wipe away his tears. "He killed himself."  
"But… why would he do that?" Mary asked, suspicious.  
"Rowena." Cas suddenly moved. He gabbed his phone off the table and called Crowley's mother frantically.  
"Cas, slow down…" Sam tried to talk some sense into the angel, without result  
"I'll have to check in with Crowley, too." Cas muttered. The witch picked up. "Rowena, I need help with an obedience spell. Now." Angel's eyes were glowing blue from nerves. The hunters decided to step away and Mary examined the scene. It did look like Ketch kill himself. She'll need to inform Mick…  
"Listen to me, I'll owe you one." Cas hushed whatever Rowena's rules were. "The vessel for the spell is a cross-shaped tattoo, only one out of ten lives trough the ritual, then all the feelings disappear and they become perfect soldiers…"  
"Get her on speaker." Dean demanded. Cas pushed the button.  
"… know this spell." All the people could hear the smile in her voice. "It was used during the Inquisition times, it's a very nasty curse."  
"Any way to remove it?" Cas cut in.  
"A few… but it does take a while. Most curses like this are effective only until the person dies, so if the cursed were to be brought back, the curse would be removed."  
"Thanks, Rowena." Castiel breathed. "I owe you."  
Angel disconnected the call and turned towards Ketch, bloody mess left of his head…  
"Cas, are you sure you can bring him back…?" Sam asked.  
"Are you sure you want?" Dean swooped in.  
"He just killed himself so he didn't have to kill me." Castiel interrupted. "I am sure."  
Angel kneeled next to the man and touched him lightly on the cheek. The white-gold light seeped from Castiel's hand and Arthur's wounds disappeared. Cas closed his eyes, concentrating his grace, finding the lost soul on the way down…  
The reaper just looked at him and stepped away. He grabbed Arthur's soul and tore through the fabrics of reality back to the bunker.  
Ketch woke up taking a deep, panicked breath and looking at Castiel with wild, open eyes.  
"No!" He hissed. "I'll have to kill you! Why did you bring me back, Castiel?!"  
"It's okay." Cas tried. "The curse is removed."  
"What?" Ketch flinched away from the angel, and then he froze half-move. The cross was gone. A wave of unbelief and relief flooded him as he stared at his palm, free of any marks.  
"You're free." Castiel said, frowning at him, and for the first time Arthur felt that, the chains on his soul lift away like they were never there. All that was blocked away catching up with him. Pain, happiness, freedom… love.  
He looked at Cas once again, the blues eyes, the open expression, the brightness. Cas was his Sun. And now Ketch knew why.  
"I bloody love you." Arthur said and kissed Castiel with all he got.  
Cas traced his fingers along Ketch's hairline, in the place where a few seconds ago was a huge gap. He pushed the assassin against the wall, kissing him back and slipping a hand on his neck.  
"We should go." Mary whispered, hardly stopping her laughter.  
"Yeah." Sam grinned, whispering back. "I'm sure there's something to hunt. Something that'll take three days. Or a week."  
Dean said something along the lined of "hgdbgdwhut".  
"I would like to remind you I am a celestial being." Castiel put half an inch space between him and Arthur who fisted his trenchcoat, tugging his tie to get the angel back to the passionate kiss. "I can hear you."  
Sam and Mary tugged Dean out of the bunker. Ketch looked at Castiel, his eyes closed, their foreheads touching.  
"I mean it." He said. "I bloody love you."  
"I think I love you too." Cas said and they kissed again.

EIGHT YEARS LATER  
"Have you ever pictured yourself like this?" Arthur asked Cas with a smile.  
Castiel returned the expression, fixing Ketch's tie. His trenchcoat was left on the chair for he had to look presentable and while he had no idea why the coat would be an issue he left it at home after Arthur's persuasion.  
"No." He said truthfully. "I pictured myself fighting, but not having a home or…a partner."  
Arthur grinned at him and kissed Cas passionately, brushing his hand through angel's hair.  
"Arthur!" Cas scolded, looking offended. "I just fixed them a minute ago!"  
"They suit you better messy." Ketch grinned and Cas just couldn't argue.  
"Do I look fine?" Arthur asked, showing his new garniture.  
"You look great." Cas nodded. "I'm sure Claire will be delighted to see you."  
"You too, you know?" Arthur elbowed Castiel.  
"The man who stole her father's body?" Castiel looked sceptical.  
"She'll feel like he was there with her." Arthur nudged Cas' side. "She gets accepted into force, she'll get her own badge."  
"I'm proud of her." Cas said, letting Arthu fix his collar and kiss him on the forehead.  
"I know." Ketch nodded and hugged his partner.  
They stood like that for a long moment.  
"We're gonna be late." Cas pointed out.  
"Fashionably late." Arthur grinned. "This is how we do it in England, sweetie."  
Cas rolled his eyes and they went through the door, holding hands.

END


End file.
